Seems hard at first time,huh? But actually all you need is little understanding and the two of you can become the best friends (as much as this is possible). I can consider myself lucky from this point of view, my mother-in-law remembers pretty good when she was like me and she gets the thing that the newlyweds have their own life and they should live this life according to their principles. But I also know that most of the wives (especially at the beginning) have different kinds of conflicts with their mothers-in-law and to them I “dedicate” this article!

Why do usually mothers-in-law “fight”?

• An authoritarian mother. A dominant style of upbringing does not give good results. An overgrown son remains dependent, not initiative, and uncertain while all his contemporaries have already achieved quite a lot in life. It is hard for such a person to decide to get married. And even after having been got married, he is unable of doing anything without his mother’s approval.
• An unhappy woman. If a mother convinces her son since early childhood that she lives only for him, and that she has sacrificed her personal life for him, then he is likely to have a complex of guilt because his mother was always unhappy. His mother will always be in a privileged position and he will have a fear of losing her. Having developed so many complexes in her son, such a mother makes him unsuitable for marriage and she herself becomes an unbearable mother-in-law.
• A needless woman. If your mother-in-law lacks men’s attention and needs it very much, she may attack you just to make her son (the only man available) pay attention and sympathize with her. And she is ready for everything, not only to quarrel with you, but even to make you divorce her son.
• Or, maybe your mother-in-law just loves her son so much that she can’t agree with the fact that her son is being taken by another woman.

Here are what you should do to achieve a peaceful ambiance with your mother-in-law:

• Your first meeting with your husband’s parents is of utmost importance, because their first impression of you may become decisive. You should be dressed neatly, be woman-like, and behave according to the way you are dressed. It is necessary for you to make a good impression on them.

• Do not try to make friends with the father-in-law, and in the process ignore the mother-in-law. You should treat both of them equally.

• Do not reject your mother-in-law’s help and pieces of advice, even if they seem unnecessary for you. Suppose your mother-in-law suggested that you repair your apartment together, and you say, “We can do it all by ourselves”. Such a reaction makes her effort in getting along with you useless. So, if you decided to reject her help, do it tactfully.

• Do not complain of your mother-in-law to your husband, relatives (especially your mother), and acquaintances of yours. If your mother-in-law finds it out, she won’t forgive you — even if all your complaints are justified.

• If you have quarreled with your mother-in-law, do not be unforgiving. Be ready for a discussion and for compromises. If you cannot live together in peace, sign a treaty not to interfere into each other lives and live separately.